"What is crooked cannot be made straight, and what is lacking cannot be counted."
Worry.
We wake to find what we don’t have, what we wished for not waiting dream-freed in existence. What to do, or say about what to think now?
We keep checking and there never seems to be enough, and so, worry becomes us. In fact, the average person invests hours worrying about a variety of circumstances - finances, relationships, career, health, future, past, decisions made and to be made, etc. Worry is a response to life uncontrollable or unavoidable. Sometimes we are the cause for worry in life painted with our mistakes or irresponsibility, and figure we should do better; worry binds itself to our movements and decisions. Other times, worry elevates in our hearts as life swings unyieldingly and the outcome seems all but favorable.
At some point along your way in life, you will worry your brains out and fret for hours, maybe even days piled on top of days, and your viewpoint will cloud a grayer hue as worry shrouds possibility of good and better.
While worry is certainly unavoidable, the holding to worry absolutely is. Here’s something telling to consider: what is your initial reaction to adversity, large or small?
In honesty, my response echoes a hollow, worry. There are times in my life when worry jumps from my heart. In those times, I don’t think well. My thoughts anemic to trust. And so, worry leaves me floating neither in the here nor there, but somewhere in the vague middle, clothed in fear and undone in anxiety.
“Vanity of vanities, says the Preacher, vanity of vanities! All is vanity.”
No matter how you make your way through life, what you do or don’t do, the opportunities you seize and the ones you let lie, all is vanity, worthless. Years from now, no one will remember you or much of what you did, if even anything at all. A common mistake made by those sunk in worry is the idea that life depends on effort birthed from our hearts and resolve. That’s just not the case. No matter the size of the life you build, it is all vanity.
We reach for what cannot be had by our own hand while seeing past simplicity.
I worry about making it to successful to appease my value and worth in this space of life I’m in. I couldn’t possibly keep accurate count of how many hours I’ve stayed up sleepless, worrying about how my book will be received, what I will write next and if it will even matter. Compound this worry about my career with the worry I invest in regarding my daughters and who they will soon be in life, and I span periods of months when I worry with more consistency than anything else. One day, it simply will not matter in the grand scheme of things.
Life moves on; we must decide if we will live it or worryingly watch it pass by.
What’s larger and more founded than the fading details of our lives in years to come is right now. If you are to quiet worry’s ringing and overcome it’s weight, you need to devalue your footprint in this life and cling to what really does have lasting weight.
Eternity will forever overshadow time, no matter its steep drops and treacherous, momentary climbs. That is what the wisest king to grace this life, referenced as the Preacher, found at the ends of the Earth - all is vanity and meaningless in this life outside of God in eternity.
And so the striving and wriggling in days sinking as a boat swallowing water can be abandoned for a greater Knowledge.
In moments of worry, I must turn, not stare. Worry is my friend when it causes me to pause and turn helpless to Christ who owns all I need. I arm worry as my enemy when I sit and stare holding it as habit.